In what expert analysts are calling “the fight of the year,” Dana White decided Monday to put Brock Lesnar in the octagon with an 800 pound Bengal tiger named Betsy. “After Brock’s loss to Cain Velesquez, I knew I had to reach deep into my bag of tricks to come up with an exciting opponent. Well {smirking}, I think I found one.”

Of the fight, Joe Rogan, UFC announcer said, “His skill set compliments Betsy perfectly. Lesnar has well-rounded stand up and a dominating ground game while the tiger has six inch claws that can rip through skin.” Mike Goldberg, his co-host, disagreed. "Lesnar has so many more weapons in his arsenal. He has vicious ground-and-pound, brutal overhand strikes, and a devastating leg kick. Though it's hard to overlook that the tiger can produced fifteen hundred pounds per square inch of bite pressure."

As a result of his training and high-protein diet, Lesnar has bulked up to 305 pounds. And though he’s outweighed by almost 500 pounds, Brock will enjoy a 14 inch reach advantage, which is significantly longer than the tiger’s. 

“I believe that hard work pays off.” A sweaty Brock said. “You put in the time, you see the results. Betsy, on the other hand, sits on her ass all day wagging her tail. Maybe she’ll pace back and forth for a few hours. That’s hardly the training program of a champion.”

Set for 3 five-minute rounds at the Mandalay Bay arena in Las Vegas, Betsy will have home field advantage as she is on loan from Siegfried and Roy over at the Mirage Hotel. “She’s a beautiful, majestic creature,” said Roy, still recovering from neck trauma suffered at the hands of Betsy. “Just don’t stare her in the face for too long.”

Brock is already making a bold prediction. “Knock out, first round!” While Brock has been extremely vocal about the fight, Betsy has laid low, not saying much if anything at all. One reporter tried to get Betsy’s thoughts on the fight, but the interview was cut short when the tiger swiped at the camera, shattering the electronic device into pieces.

“Yeah, it’s gonna be some fight,” said Dana White, still grinning ear-to-ear. “If Brock can avoid the tiger’s four inch teeth that can penetrate steel, I predict his stamina will outlast Betsy’s. However, if the fight only goes one round, I predict the tiger will maul Brock in fifteen seconds.

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